An Opportunity for Grace

My daughter is in her first year of band this year. For those of you who have never had a child learn an instrument...be grateful. And a huge shout-out goes to my blessed parents who survived two children who both learned multiple instruments. Bless you.

Actually, (mom brag moment here) my daughter is doing pretty well. She picked the trumpet (complete shock to me) and I was bracing myself for the worst. But it really hasn't been that bad. I'm proud of her that she's taking the initiative to learn something. She comes from a musical family, on both sides, so it's really not all that surprising I suppose.

Anyways, today was band day. Now because I homeschool, I have to take her in and bring her home from her short lesson twice a week. On those days, we have to alter our schedule a bit to fit that in, but so far so good. We went in today, I dropped her off and then proceeded to head to town to do a quick errand. But then I got a phone call about halfway into town from her, saying that there was no band today.

Hmm...I didn't get an email...no phone call...and no one seemed to know why it was cancelled. I turned around, picked her up, drove back into town, and then headed home.

There were two different reactions that I could've had for this circumstance. I could've:

1. Got really frustrated and angry that I drove all the way into town for nothing (we live out in the country) and sulked all the way home about the waste of time and gas....(and change nothing btw)

OR

2. Showed grace.


How many times do we allow little things or mistakes of others to irritate us? I'm sure we can all think of a time when someone has let us down either intentionally or unintentionally. And I know we can all recall something, which was really insignificant in the big scheme of things, that got under our skin and caused us to lose our cool. Why does this happen?

Well...it's because we are selfish sinful people. Plain and simple. Our natural tendency is to put our own selves and agendas first and foremost. When something or someone inconveniences us or forces us to change our plans (even on a very minor scale) we become agitated and often birth a reaction from that.

But what if we didn't?

What if, instead, we showed grace? What would that look like? Would that change anything? I mean after all, you would want someone to extend grace to you when you screw up...so why not do the same for others yourself?

Well, I can't guarantee it would change your circumstance or even the other person's reaction...but it will change you and your heart. When we fight against our natural tendencies and extend grace, it does something to us. It allows the Holy Spirit to come in and soften our hearts. When we do that, guess what? Others notice....because that's NOT the norm.

It also brings joy. Frustration, anger, and hatred only produce more frustration, anger, and hatred. No one enjoys being angry all the time. It's uncomfortable, stressful, and hard on the soul and body.

I chose to extend grace today :) I admit, I had to fight my natural urge to be irritated. But choosing grace was so much better. I mean...how many times have I forgotten something?? (TOO many times...it's embarrassing really.)

Can you imagine what our world would look like if we gave grace more than we gave in to our natural reactions?? So why not look for opportunities to extend grace? You won't regret it :)

Changing of Seasons

I love fall. The leaves change color, the humid summer air transforms into crisp cool breezes, my house smells like an apple pie and a pumpkin had a baby. So much sweetness. Love. Sigh....

But even though fall is BY FAR my favorite season, I love different things about each one. Summer is full of laying by the pool, gardening, traveling, and relaxing. Spring brings beauty, newness, and end of school. Even nasty winter has pros: Christmas, snow (only in the month of December is it allowed), seeing relatives, snuggling with hot cocoa and a good Christmas movie. There's something to love about each season.

There's also cons to each season though. I'm not a "negative nancy" by nature, but there are definite things, with each season, that I could do without. Such as:

Spring: mud...e-v-e-r-y-w-h-e-r-e. We live on a farm. Need I say more?

Summer: humidity + naturally curly but I want a part of it straight hair = pure frustration

Winter: Snow, not in December. Enough said.

And even sweet sweet fall has it's downfall.....bugs. Flies, japanese beetles, and boxelder bugs become a modern day version of the Biblical plagues here. Gross.

As I was channeling my inner Aristotle about such things, I was struck at how similar the concept is to seasons in life. Life is a constant "change of seasons". And you know what?? I'm SO grateful! As much as I would love to life in permanent "fall" mode, I would honestly get bored of it eventually. I welcome change. Change brings new, fresh, and often exciting things! It can also bring devastation, despair, and rocky roads. Just like the seasons, there can be good and hard things with each transition.

Sometimes we are in a season that we wish would last forever. But you know what? I guarantee you, at some point, you would long for some change of some kind. It's in our nature. And if we lived in the same season all the time, we wouldn't grow, we wouldn't learn, and we wouldn't experience God in ways that we never would otherwise. Change is good friends. SO good.

So rather than fight it or dread it....embrace it. Look at it as an exciting adventure. If it's tragedy you're facing, allow yourself to grieve...but also search for God through it. Open yourself to Him so that you can experience Him in an amazing way, and so that He can use you in it. Having that perspective changes everything. It may not remove the blow...but it can soften it :)

Sweet friend....I've been there. I've seen A LOT of the changing of seasons in my life....and it's not done yet. But I've learned that there is something to be gained by each one. Treasure it because it won't last forever. That season will change :)

A Bit of Honesty...

Here's some brutal and open honesty. And trust me...this doesn't paint a pretty picture of me. But I do hope the end result points to our incredible Savior and His great mercy.

I homeschool our 3 kids. Enough said. Close the book....stick a fork in me I'm done. I wish I could tell you that I love it so much, that my kids are the highlight of my day, and that I wouldn't trade this for the world. But....I would be lying to you. Yep. I said it. Brutal honesty. Now, don't get me wrong- I LOVE my kids! But I do not love being around them (or any kids for that matter) 24:7. It's not where my passion lies. And for the longest time I felt like such a jerk for it. I see others who thrive being around children and who admittedly love it. Inside I'm thinking, they are insane! Ha! I used to love being around kids more though. I babysat a lot, was a camp counselor for years, and even studied Elementary Education. But then I had my own kids. And then, kicking and screaming, I decided to homeschool.

Now you may be asking yourself "Why would she homeschool if she doesn't love being around kids all the time??". Believe me...I ask myself that All. The. Time. But see the reason I do it, goes deeper than my selfishness. It's because God called me to it. Seriously. I fought it for years. In fact, I practically screamed at a sweet friend of mine, "I will NEVER homeschool my kids!!", when she asked me if I had ever considered it. (Thankfully she still loved me, despite my hostility!...And she laughed hysterically when I told her I decided to do it lol!) But God, for some unbeknownst reason to me, wants me to. I fought and fought against it for over a year. But everywhere I turned, everything I heard, and deep inside my soul I knew it was what He wanted me to do.

Have you ever fought against something so hard....like made it your mission in life to NOT do it?? Yeah...it was like that. But I surrendered to it one day, and immediately experienced an indescribable peace like never before.

But just because I KNOW God calls me to this, doesn't mean I always love it.

Sometimes we face things in life that are hard, unpleasant, and ugly. But there is purpose in it. God often allows us to experience things either so we can experience Him in a certain way, or our character and heart can be grown and molded to what He desires it to be.

That's what He's doing here with me. I see that now. And it's days like today that I'm reminded of it and am clinging to it desperately. Overall today was a good day actually. But my heart has been struggling with selfishness lately. And sometimes I allow that to overflow into other areas in my life. I actually sat down to "vent" here. But God, in His great mercy, lifted the veil for a moment and allowed me to see a glimpse of "why" He's called me to something that stretches and grows me in an, often times, uncomfortable way. It would be so much easier for me to thrown in the towel, send my kids off to school, and basque in the quiet and stillness of an empty house. But I know there's a greater purpose in the path He has chosen for me. Romans 8:28 says that God works all things together for good. I love that verse and the reminder that it brings when I'm struggling. I'm so thankful for God's great mercy, love, and that He loves me enough to grow and stretch me to become the woman He desires me to be.

*Side note: I don't hate kids lol :) Really I don't! I just wanted to clarify that God has created me to be passionate about different things...and if I had the choice I'd probably rather hang out with adults haha! I love kids and think that parenting and discipling them is very important. But it doesn't come as easy to me as to others. Just wanted to clarify!

To the working woman- both inside and outside of the home

There are so many things that people seem to have an opinion about these days. Whether women work in or out of the home seems to be one of those things that no one can agree on. I came across a blog about that this morning and honestly....and I was heart-broken about it. It was clear that the post was written to "guilt" women into staying at home- even claiming that it is biblical to do so. That may or may not be the case (Scripture is not clear on that- at least that I have seen). But even so, my encouragement to those that have a somewhat fixated view of the woman's role is this:

God created man and woman equal in his eyes. Equal in how he loves them. Yes, we are created for different roles. God created man to do things woman cannot and vice versa. There is nothing wrong with that...at all. What he did not create was a "lesser" being. Not lesser...just different. When we view the two genders through that lens, it allows us to look at it from a different perspective.

You see, humanity has skewed the roles originally created by God. We've even taken scripture and twisted it to support our agendas. And then we've taken that into the Church and attacked other brothers and sisters in Christ under the umbrella of being "biblical". This blog was saying that it was wrong for women to work outside of the home. My response was this:

"I understand what you're saying but I feel like there needs to be a word of caution here. This is one of those "open-handed" issues that we need to be careful with. Scripture is not 100% clear here on that. And honestly, it's not something that adds or detracts from the gospel, so we need to be careful not to cause division or dissension here. All too often we take scripture, interpret it, and then go out on a mission with it. We should consider some things before we do that though: Does it bring glory to God? Does it point us to Christ? Does it build up His Church? Is it pertinent to the gospel? If any of these answers are no, then we need to reconsider our intentions. Whether women choose to stay home or to be in the workplace is a decision that is between them and God and their family. We cannot preach that it is "bad" to not be a homemaker. That does not point people to Christ and it definitely does not build up the church. Women have an incredible opportunity to be used by God both at home and in the work place. I happen to be a SAHM but know and respect a lot of women who are not. Again, arguing this point only brings division and detracts from Christ. Sometimes women don't have a choice...and saying something like this article does nothing but bring them down. That is not what Christ wants for His Church. We need to encourage one another and we need to pray and support those sisters that are out in the secular world front lines everyday- that they can be a light there! So thank you for your opinion, but I encourage you to just think through something like this before its posted next time :)We need to encourage and point each other to Christ first and foremost :)"

So let's remember this for any "issue" that may arise that is not pertinent to the core of the Gospel.

-Does it bring glory to God?
-Does it point us to Christ?
-Does it build up His Church?
-Is it pertinent to the Gospel message?

God calls us to different paths in life. He has a purpose for each of them. We need to focus on encouraging one another in these journeys- not pushing our own agendas. Maybe God has called you to be a homemaker, maybe He's called you into the work place. Wherever He has placed you, may you be open to be used for His glory! Be the light in your home and in your work place!

To the Weary Mama...

"To the weary mama..."

https://www.facebook.com/heather.m.olson.7/videos/10153556661865465/

Life can be lonely. Motherhood can be lonely. Even though you're surrounded by little people 24:7, you can still feel incredibly alone. But sweet mamas, let me tell you something. You're not alone! And you weren't meant to do this journey alone! Don't be afraid to reach out and share your struggles. There are people out there that have been in your shoes, that would love to help you, but aren't aware of your need. God gave us community for a reason! It does "take a village" and don't let the lies of the enemy tell you otherwise. We aren't meant to do life alone- no matter what stage you're in. It will help you to be a better mom when you slow others to invest in you and your children! Our culture tells us we should be able to "do it all" but that simply is not true. Lean into your tribe and remember that this difficult season is just that- a season.

Recent Revelation...

I began experimenting with Facebook Live :) This one was a recent revelation that I had. Hope you are encouraged!



https://www.facebook.com/heather.m.olson.7/videos/10154002679645465/